I've spend the majority of my time this past week on trying to figure out what to write about. Normally something would just come up to me and I'd write but it's been a while since it just came to me.
Writing has become a task. I've even thought about taking a break from writing but I don't know it if will help. Sometimes you just got to push through, right? As soon as I handed over the keys to my old apartment I could feel my body shutting off. I've pushed myself to the very limit and then I just collapsed. I took a few days "off". I didn't unpack any bags. I didn't open any boxes. I just existed. I need to give myself a peptalk before I can drag myself to the shower. I live around the corner from the store but I asked someone who was coming over if they could bring me some milk because I was literally too tired to get up. I just told my baby girl that we're going to buy some new flowers because th ones we have now are pretty much dead and now I'm sitting here regretting that I ever said anything. All I do is complain these last few weeks, or has it been months? It feels like years. But that's not why I write. I don't want to write about all that sucks in my life right now. I want to write about the things that don't suck, the things that give me energy but since I don't have a lot that's giving me energy... why bother writing? I don't want to stop. I want to keep going and do what I came here to do... but I've lost track of that goal. I'm just writing so I don't quit. Ok this has to change. I'm going to push myself to do more so I have more energy sources and more to write about. I'm done sitting around and hearing myself complain. If I'm sick of my own complaining I'm scared to ask how sick you must be. One thing I know. I'm not giving up. Why? Because I know why I started. I'm not done yet!
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AuthorMy passion is writing. I started writing stories when I was only 6 years old and I still do it today. Blogging is something I've been wanting to do for a long time, so here we are. Archives
July 2017
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